The New Year is here, and with it, many unspoken expectations. Our performance-oriented culture suggests adopting new practices and setting new goals for ourselves. Social media posts are loaded with every expert’s “shoulds” to make this your best year ever! And no one can deny that countless of these posts promote weight loss. We are bombarded with the message that changing our bodies to fit our culture’s measure of “perfect” is our most significant need.
Don’t get me wrong – setting goals is not bad, per se, but this time of year, the emphasis on them gets a little out of control. The pressure created by media, particularly social media, gets intense and can be challenging for those in recovery from an eating disorder and those who struggle with disordered eating to navigate. Diet culture has taught us that our security is in following a plan. The underlying message behind these – you are not enough. These influencers suggest that when you arrive at their level of “perfect,” you will be accepted, you will have friends, and you will then (and only then) be carefree and truly happy!
When we set New Year’s weight-loss-based goals, they seem to generate feelings of hope. It seems exciting to think about what life will be like “if” we stick to it, “if” we are “good,” and “if” we work hard enough. Did you notice the lack of uncertainty and self-focus in that last statement? This “success” and “happiness” only come if we meet all the criteria in a certain amount of time, and it’s all based on self-effort. We have to do everything the plan prescribes perfectly. The hope is short-lived because the plan is often rigid, allowing little to no room for error. The striving becomes exhausting. If we don’t keep up or meet the goal, we feel discouraged, hopeless, like failures. Diet culture and its many significant voices lead us to believe that it’s not that the plan has failed but that we have failed. We turn the focus inward, believing we are “no good” and should have worked harder. The results lead to harsh, negative self-talk and unhealthy, restrictive behaviours, especially for those with a negative body image or history of eating disorders or disordered eating behaviours.
At the start of this new year, let’s consider a different way forward. Let’s be curious about grace-filled rhythms rather than a stringent list of must-dos. What simple, life-giving practices could you adopt that lead to true mental, emotional, physical and spiritual well-being that serve you and your family? Please give yourselves grace, friends. Ask God to give you a new perspective on your life and value.
Micah 6:8 reminds us of what God requires: to do justice, love mercy, and walk humbly with our God. God gave us our bodies (yes, our bodies are gifts!) as instruments that enable us to serve Him and love others. Let’s prayerfully seek His wisdom as we choose grace-filled rhythms that lead to life and point others to the true source of life—Jesus.
If you are eager to embrace grace-filled rhythms at the start of this new year or curious to adopt a new perspective on your value (outside of diet culture’s narrative), I would love to hear from you. I help my clients gain clarity on the underlying roots of their struggle with food and their bodies. Together, we create realistic, personalized goals pursuing true, sustainable, heart-level change. To learn more about the services I offer, visit my website, https://www.space4grace.ca/.
To schedule a free consultation, Click Here or email info@space4grace.ca